In other news, White House shill Norm Coleman's father, was caught screwing in a car near a pizzeria. Coleman did not "condone" his father's behavior and was "deeply disturbed" by what he had "learned." We don't know what kind of crap his father fed the Congresscritter while he was being reared, but I have a slightly different take on the matter: Give pappy a big fat cigar! Pour him some brandy and pat him on the back. Why? Well, first of all, sex is natural, sex is fun. But more than that: The elder Coleman is (ahem) 81! And his automotive partner? 38! How cool is that? Christ, when I'm 81, I hope I'm caught in a car with a filly half my age. That's friggin' inspiring.
NOTE TO COLEMAN'S FATHER: While we applaud your conquest, you might've tried to get a room in the nearby hotel or maybe opted for a parking spot off the beaten path. Ask a local teenager for directions (and maybe some new techniques--and a condom).